I used to think this about grape flavored things. UNTIL I tasted fresh Concord grapes for the first time. Grape flavor truly tastes just like Concord grapes

It really gets me how everyone wants you to support local business so they succeed and then when they get big and successful..... Now they're evil and shouldn't be supported any more. But also how terrible it is that all these big old businesses are going out of business

Most daycares don't clean their toys even remotely as often as they tell you they do

This customer is clearly underage!

'bout to pop Athena out his forehead.

I mean, to be fair, who wants to be with someone who would do the birdbox challenge?

There's an app called run and pee that will give you "cues" for when to go pee, how long this less important part is, and a quick rundown of what happens in this time. They even have a timer and tell you how long before the next good spot

Whoa

The real question is, is your child trying to use the computer when you are telling him he can't? IE: He's supposed to be going to bed or doing homework but he's goofing off on the computer instead? Just remind him that even though the COMPUTER is his, the electricity and internet are yours.

Does lick our faces because in the wild when a canine licks the face of another canine who has been out hunting the hunter will regurgitate some of it's kill for the licker to eat. They are asking us to barf for them.

I usually browse through with a blank face but this made me crack a grin of appreciation. A lovely piece. Very peaceful

This is how hotel carpet makes me feel

Because you're always complaining about how long we take!!!

#1. I once paid the first months rent for my two roommates and one of them bought a unicycle with their first paycheck instead of paying me back

Are those little soaps in there?

Does anybody else find these the most boring tasteless cookies in the world?

I'm very lucky. I get to be what I like to think of as "striking". Not ugly, but attractive to only a few, but VERY attractive to those few. The perks of both worlds

Happy Birthday. December Birthday's suck. Mine is the 30th. Stay strong.

Um, is that cat sitting on a chocolate covered strawberry?

I stopped using my fingerprint scanner for the opposite reason. My fingers are to dry to get recognized

I worked at a daycare where we weren't allowed to sit on the floor, we HAD to sit on chairs. Otherwise it would "take us too long to get up if something happened with a kid out of reach"

Perhaps I CAN safely break my promise never to use a mandolin again....